Oh! No John! No!
English traditional This one is especially fun when there is someone named John in the audience. I have included the patter script that has developed, but feel free to come up with your own... I will keep playing C and G7 in rythm while speaking... I first ran across this one years ago in a book called "Ballads, Songs and Snatches." Oh - and don't let the multiple chord changes daunt you - with practice, they fall easily into a pattern, both on autoharp and guitar.C G C G
On yonder hill there stands a maiden
C G C G
Who she is I do not know;
C Am F G7
I shall court her, for her beauty,
C F G7
She must answer yes or no,
(What is this? Ah! a renaissance/medieval dating game!)
C F G C G7 C
Oh, no John, no John, no John, no!C G C G
2. Madam, on thy face is beauty
C G C G
On thy lips wild roses grow,
C Am F G7
Madam, I would be thy lover,
C F G7
Madam, answer yes or no,
C F G C G7 C
Oh, no John, no John, no John, no!(Hmmm…. She must be playing hard to get)
C G C G
3. Madam. on thy face is beauty,
C G C G
At thy bosom lilies grow,
C Am F G7
In your bower there is pleasure,
C F G7
Shall I view it? Yes or no.
C F G C G7 C
Oh, no John, no John, no John, no!(Ok… his best two pickup lines and he’s getting nowhere….. fast! Now wait, he’s got one more…He's going to up the stakes...)
C G C G
4. Madam, I will give you jewels
C G C G
I will make you rich and free;
C Am F G7
I will give you silks and satins
C F G7
Madam, if you lie with me. (Yes? Yes? Please???)
C F G C G7 C
Oh, no John, no John, no John, no!(This poor guy! He’s pulled out all the stops and she’s still not cooperating! Ah… but she speaks!)
C G C G
5. My husband is a Spanish captain,
C G C G
He went to sea a month ago.
C Am F G7
First he kissed me, then he left me,
C F G7
Bade me always answer "No!" (Ah… the lightbulb goes on over his head!)
C F G C G7 C
Oh, no John, no John, no John, no!(Ok now… he’s got this figured out! It’s not WHAT you ask for – it’s HOW you ask for it! )
C G C G
6. Madam, may I tie your garter
C G C G
Just an inch above your knee?
C Am F G7
If my hand should slip a little farther,
C F G7
Would you think it ill of me? (And she says – with a smile….)
C F G C G7 C
Oh, no John, no John, no John, no!(Ah! That smile… but wait! This could be a double edged sword… I wonder – Is our hero in trouble now?)
C G C G
7. My love and I went to bed together,
C G C G
There we lay till the cocks did crow;
C Am F G7
Open your arms my dearest darling,
C F G7
Open your arms and let me go. (Let me go! Let me go!! Come on, now... let me GO!! She's still smiling...)
C F G C G7 C
Oh, no John, no John, no John, no!Return to Miscellaneous Folk Songs
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